"Every child grows. Everything depends on the teacher"
"Children learn to smile from their parents"
- Shinichi Suzuki
Modelling is such an important factor for teachers and parents. If we want a child to do something, we need to be sure we are modelling that behaviour in our own lives. If we want a child NOT to do something, we need to be sure we are NOT modeling that behaviour in our own lives. Being a teacher and a parent has made me take a good hard look at myself and my life. This has been TERRIFYING! This has been OVERWHELMING. Of course we as parents and/or teachers have the best intentions, but many of us are still figuring out who we are and what kind of parents we want to be. We are bound to make mistakes. I have found that being a role model is a constant work in progress and that showing my work in progress can make me an even better role model.
Being wrong and making a mistake isn't negative, it just means we have more to learn. The more we learn, the more we know and when we know better, we can do better. At the end of the day, especially in my family of perfectionists, making a mistake and OWNING IT is one of the greatest attitudes I can model.
"Rise to the level of the child"
"Man is a child of his environment"
-Shinichi Suzuki
When modelling isn't enough, it's important each day to meet a child at their level. Sometimes they are focused and ready to learn. Sometimes they need time to get there. Sometimes it becomes obvious we aren't going to get any focus that day or that moment and that's okay. Sometimes it becomes obvious we as teachers/parents are just out of ideas and not on top of our game. We can all have off days. I'm learning to give myself these days without judgement and to acknowledge them in front of my family.
When we meet a child at their level, we become aware of what they are doing in the moment and what they are interested in. Where is their mind at RIGHT NOW. If it's in a book then try incorporating the book into the practice. If it's stacking legos, stack legos for each repetition of a practice spot. Maybe it's running and doing jumping jacks before playing or listening to the Suzuki music if they need a moment to unwind. Maybe it's trying to be clear on the expectations for the day and giving them time and reminders as to when one activity ends and another begins. It's about clearing OUR minds of our to-dos, our schedule, our worries, and focusing exactly on where our child is at in the moment and how we can help them find focus, build teamwork and create enjoyment when practicing the violin.
This is not an easy task. First of all, the violin is HARD! Standing still is hard! Focusing is hard! Listening to mom/dad is hard! Witnessing all the silly as a parent is hard! But can a child do it? YES! Can the parent do it? YES! When parent and child work through these tough moments together learning the violin, they can accomplish and get through ANYTHING TOGETHER! A trust is built unlike any other because both parent and child have struggled together, succeeded together, brought out the best and the worst in each other and they've learned more than they ever could have imagined along the way about each other and themselves. Meet a child at their level, mentally and physically. Play like they play, imagine like they imagine, and build practice (or any teachable moment) off of that.
As adults, it is also important to look at the models in our lives. Maybe it's our spouse, our coworkers, our family, our neighbours, our friends. It's the people we choose to follow on social media or watch on tv or read books about. If we are surrounding ourselves with positive people who inspire and motivate us, that plays the same role in our growth as it does our kids. Kids don't always have the same accessibility to choose their models yet, but we do! I think we can be mindful of the kind of people we are spending our time with and how their energy is affecting us and in turn our kids.
"Any child can be developed. It depends on how you do it." - Shinichi Suzuki
Since we've been spending so much time at home together, what we are modelling to our children is even more profound. If we want our kids to get up and get ready for the day, focus during school (virtual or not), be active, eat healthy, do their practice and their school work, have a positive attitude - they are looking at us all day and at what we are doing. What we expect of our kids, we must FIRST expect of ourselves. The more we demonstrate the habits, discipline and perseverance in our lives, the better the example we are providing for those of all ages, regardless of if they follow our example in the moment or not. Children are constantly absorbing what they see and hear from us so when we make it a priority to expose them to the values, attitudes, habits and behaviours we deem important, we are building the ground work for success as they grow.
Keep modeling, keep learning, keep growing. Let's continue developing the best environment for our kids and ourselves to grow in, one small step at a time.
***I've always loved writing and creating and this blog is on outlet for me to share topics that I am interested in, things I've been learning, and ideas I've been bouncing around. Take from it what you'd like with that in mind, whether you agree or disagree - all I'm sharing are my CURRENT opinions and ideas - these are ever changing because so am I! If any of this provides inspiration, thought or maybe even sparks a new idea that you can take into your lifestyle, that is enough. Thanks for reading!***
